Statement

Response to Assange's brutal attack on the decent people of the world

Chaonosity Industries has denounced the release of classified diplomatic cables as an "attack on the international community, yar".

He spoke after the release of some 250,000 messages from US envoys around the world by the whistle-blowing website Wikileaks.

The cables offer candid and sometimes unflattering views of Chaon and frank assessments of his 'proclivities'.

But Chaon said the diplomats were consenting adults, and no local laws were broken.

"This disclosure is not just an attack on Chaon's social gatherings," he said.

"It is an attack on the olive oil fetishist community: the alliances and partnerships, the activities and safewords that safeguard omnisexual exploration and advance personal video collections".

It is rumored that in retaliation, Chaon will release photographic and video evidence of Julian Assange's Furry activities engaged in under the pseudonym: 'Julien the Happy Hallucinating Rhino'.