Thursday, April 16, 2009

Paradigm Shift

In general usage, an axiom is a universally recognized truth. Now, I have evidence that will reshape human knowledge as it currently stands. Here are the relevant axioms:

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1. Hotpot is a bunch of boiled goop.*
2. And it sucks.
3. There exist a wide variety of hotpot types, some with high quality ingredients and/or extraordinary sauces.
4. And they all suck.
5. Your friend knows of a 'special' hotpot place that you are sure to like.
6. It sucks.


* This is the most commonly accepted formulation as set down by the famous philosopher Malv.
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Entirely by accident (I signed the participation sheet for a company dinner without knowing the planned location), I found myself committed to eating at a hotpot restaurant. When I learned of the intended cuisine, I started whining and bitching along the lines of "Goddammit you should've told me it was going to be hotpot, I've told you that foreigners don't eat that stuff". But if you sign your name on one of these sheets and don't go, the company has you publicly flogged or something so I went. To a restaurant called 小肥牛 (Little Fat Cow?) on Gongyi Rd. in between Jing Cheng and Dong Xing.

Holy Christ in Heaven. Was. It. Good. None of the wonky sauce to try to spice up your boiled goop- you just pull your goop right out of the pot and eat it. (I'm talking about the mala guo; I ignored the other kind they had on the table). And the soup itself is good enough to convert Michael Turton to Catholicism. Though people looked at me kind of funny when I drank the soup, so I'm not entirely sure you're supposed to do that. I got the remaining mala soup wrapped** for take out, and enjoyed it all day yesterday.

So scratch axioms 4 and 6. And let me know if you want to try it. I'm dying for an excuse to go back.

** "wrapped" = "poured into a plastic bag which was then tied off"

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Sniff.

Exception that proves the rule.

word verification is "frackled!"

Robin said...

You know any good hotpot restaurants in Denver?

Chaon said...

As of now, I only know of one good hotpot restaurant in the whole world. Keep an eye out for 'Mongolian style' hotpot.

Chaon said...

And Mr. Anonymous: I am no expert in these things, but I am inclined to think that in this case the exception does *not* prove the rule. The statement "All X is Y" is only true until we discover some X that is not Y. So the existence of at least one hotpot that does not suck *disproves* the assertion that "All hotpot sucks".

I thank you in advance for your understanding and patience in this matter.