Chewin in the Chung

Giblets needs to lay of the speed. Still funny.

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All right. This guy William has posted The Story of Dick, Jane, and Sally. He claims that it is not a parody. But when I read it, a clarion of skeptic warning bells went off in my head. No fundamentalist is that goofy. Right?

Here's my version:
See Karl.
Karl is cool.
Karl gets drunk.
Karl never bets high when he has the two of spades down.
Karl is married to a heathen polytheist.
Karl says that virtues should be evaluated in terms of their actual and predictable consequences.
Karl steals the ideas of John Dewey.

Karl says "There is no God".
Karl doesn't believe in hell.

See Karl die.
See Karl say "Holy Crap! Pascal was right!"

See Karl in the hellfire.
See Karl say "This is not as hot as a Summer in Taiwan"
See Karl play 3-0 blitz chess with Satan.
See Karl talk trash and blow smoke in Satan's face.
See Satan blunder a rook. Oh! Satan is so angry!
See Karl reincarnated as a wombat.