Real or Satire?

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Zimbabwe President Robert Mugabe wins China’s Confucius Peace Prize

Whoa, we've got great hair

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Promoters: Jon Bon Jovi shows in Shanghai and Beijing canceled for 'unforeseen reasons'

Jon was gonna sing in Beijing
CCP got pissed
‘Bout the Dalai Lama thing

It's tough, so tough

Tico played the drums all day
Prepared for the show,
He’s ready to play
For love, for love

They say, "We've gotta strive hard to mollify Xi.
You can’t perform in China without The Party

My wife’s cousin has a son who’s in the NPC.

I’ll call, and we'll use our guanxi!"