Wednesday, September 10, 2008

From, What The World Would Look Like If The Other Side Won The War

From the "Can't tell if it's a hoax or not" files, is Snap-On really selling an energy drink called Hi-Torque? Since it's Snap-On, I guess it will cost ten times as much as all the other energy drinks, but can be purchased with great financing options.

Giblets extols the virtues of Sarah Palin
As a moose-hunting Jesus-fearing hockey-mom mother of five who hunts moose, Sarah Palin isn't some petty Washington bureaucrat. She's a petty Alaskan bureaucrat, and she's gonna shake things up in Washington! For her first reform she will pose for photographs with a gun and a stuffed moose head! For her second reform she will say something bold and brassy. For her third reform she will give birth at a live press conference to six eagle scouts, three peregrine falcons and an American mastodon, rear them in the Christian faith and release them into the wild before hunting them down, shooting them and mounting their heads in the Roosevelt Room!

Now some of you are saying "oh Giblets these aren't actual reforms" because you are boring and stupid and I hate you. But if you think about it, Sarah Palin would be reforming Washington just by being elected and finally giving a voice to marginalized white Christian evangelicals everywhere.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Almost two weeks with no posts, what's up?