Chewin in the Chung

A message to Lance (Of The Taichung Voice) and Paul (Previously of The Londoner and soon to be of The Londoner II?), from Dan "Master of Subtlety and Understatement" Ritco:

The longest f***ing river in North America is NOT the f***ing Mississippi River. It is the f***ing Mackenzie f***ing River in f***ing Canada. Any f***ing geographer who's f***ing degree is worth the f***ing paper it is f***ing printed on, knows that the length of a river is measured from it's source to it's mouth, without f***ing counting the f***ing tributaries. Your erroneous opinions on this matter simply demonstrate that you are a ****** ** ********* ******** ********** *****. Please research and adjust your views accordingly.